Saturday, February 14, 2015

Things That Have Happened!

Here's what's happened in the last month:

1. The very talented bizarro-Lothario Garrett Cook wrote a little article back in early January in which he said that I was an 'author to look out for in 2015.' Whether that's true or not, it was a very kind and unexpected gesture from him and it gave me the warm-fuzzies when I read it.


2. I also made another appearance on Jeremy Maddux's Surreal Sermons podcast, where we once again yell at each other. This Maddux dude has got a real bug up his butt. And now my real-life mother and best girl Lisa are involved too. I don't know what kinds of twists and turns this saga is going to take, but things are escalating quickly.


3. I also don't know if I made this announcement earlier, but it is official, so I suppose I should mention it: I (along with Kirk Jones) have been doing acquisitions/slush reading for Rooster Republic Press since last November. That means, if you want to pitch a book or send a manuscript to Rooster Republic, you can either talk to me, Kirk, or send it to the submissions email at

4. I HAVE FINISHED WRITING A NEW BOOK. A full-length novel, to be specific. There is no other news to report besides that, as I just finished writing it right before I made this blog update you are currently reading. But it is a HUGE relief and accomplishment whenever anything (especially lengthier things) are completed. So THANKS FOR THE SUPPORT to the three people in the world who actually support me. The rest of you can go ahead and DROWN YOURSELVES IN A SWIMMING POOL FULL OF DICKS!

As far as pimping goes, this time around I'm going to repay the favor and pimp my favorite Time Pimp:


He just released a new book HERE.

He also teaches a cheap online bizarro workshop which I hear (from the people who have taken it) is quite informative and interesting.

He also does professional editing for bizarro/horror/any type of book for, what in all actuality, is only a nominally small price.

This is the dude who's book beat my book for a Wonderland Award. So you know you're in good hands. If you are at all serious about writing and confused about where to begin or what to do, I highly suggest using Garrett's services. You won't be disappointed. If you are disappointed, well, then as I've already said, PLEASE RESUMING DROWNING YOURSELF IN THE AFOREMENTIONED SWIMMING POOL OF DICKS!

That is all for now.

~ Danger!