Tuesday, December 30, 2014



This is my last post of 2014, which isn't saying much because I rarely update this blog. But I should update more. I do little things all over the place that you may want to check out, and if you're not my friend on Facebook, you'd have no way of knowing it.

So here's what's been going on with me over the past two weeks, for your entertainment pleasure:

1. Another guest appearance on Jeremy Maddux's podcast Surreal Sermons. It's not an interview or anything like that. We basically just argue with each other for the first five minutes of the show after he found out I rejected his 'Pinata story' from Rooster Republic Press.

2. Speaking of Rooster Republic Press, they had me on as the contestant for the third episode of their bad game show, aptly called The Bad Game Show. Other guests included Justin Grimbol and Michael Allen Rose. It's basically 20 minutes of nonstop sexual confession. Those two guys are perverted as FUCK! Link here just in case the embedded video below doesn't work.

3. Lastly, Lady Terminator herself, my good friend Erika Instead, let me do a guest blog post on her B-movie blog she does for Living Dead Magazine. We watched a movie called Mutantis and it's pretty much exactly what you'd be a movie called Mutantis to be about. It's a funny blog for often-overlooked movies.

And I believe last post I said I was gonna start sticking recommendations in with each post? Did I say that? Well, regardless, I'm  going to. And my first recommendation is going to be of Michael Allen Rose's band Flood Damage. They're an industrial rock band from Chicago and they KICK-ASS. I wrote a review for their new album Instruction for the Assembly of God(s) and since there's like NOWHERE GOOD to stick a goddamn music review other than iTunes, I'm gonna copy and paste it right here:

Spooky. Kooky. All together ooky.

This is FUN music. A pop-industrial album that is gritty enough to grind you to pieces in its mechanical jaws, yet catchy enough to make you want to nod your head to the beat while you’re getting eaten alive.

Yes, this is a robot dance party hosted by the Devil and attended exclusively by a bunch of sexy, tattooed chicks all lezzing out on each other. You know what I mean?

You don’t?

Look, is there an accurate way to describe music without sound trite or derivative? People always do that "well it kinda sounds like" thing when they talk about bands: Well it kinda sounds like Ministry. Well it kinda sounds like Skinny Puppy. Well it kinda sounds like Frank Sinatra if he were a possessed blender on a mission to have sex with every appliance in the world. But what does any of that even MEAN?

I like the kind of music that paints pictures. Lyrical content aside, I dig sounds. Atmospheres. That intangible part of a song that hits you somewhere deep. The way words in a book build a world in your head, a good song, or album, can do the same. And this album certainly does just that! At times it’s like the soundtrack to some crazy supernatural slasher movie. At other times, it might be what the DJ is spinning at a vampire dance club blood orgy, like that awesome scene in Blade 2. At other points it strikes like lightning out of a matte silver cloud. And still at other points it lumbers along like a blind giant’s feet, stomping across the dirty landscape of a coal-stained city plucked straight out of some reimagined Victorian distopia. That’s what I was SEEING in my mind while I listened to Instructions for the Assembly of God(s). That's what these sounds gave me. But even with all the ATMOSPHERE that this music brings, you won’t find any lithe ambient noises tiptoeing around like a curious caterpillar. It’s not THAT kind of atmosphere I'm talking about! Instead you'll get only loud, crunchy guitars and heart-attack fast drums and ethereal, ghostly vocals the stalk you like a jilted wind. These aren’t lullabies to put you to sleep. This stuff will get you moving. Bobbing your head. Punching your mom. This album ROCKS. 

Standout track: SeXXXee (is this a George Michael homage?!)

That is all for now, person who decided to actually read all this shit and maybe click a few links. Have a great day. Enjoy life. Enjoy pizza. 


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