New Upcoming Novel! And My First Acting Job!

You read the title to this post. We're not burying the lead here. I HAVE A NEW NOVEL COMING OUT hot off the heels of my last one, I Will Rot Without You. The new book is called PUPPET SKIN and as you can see from that picture, the amazing Katie McCann once again did my cover art. Here the description from the back cover:

Hannah graduates from middle school on Friday. That is the day she transforms into a living puppet, like her parents and teachers before her. No longer a human girl made of flesh and feelings, but a perfect wooden NEW self, whose strings lead up from her limbs to an endless black void above. With no pain. No sorrow. No sickness. No fear.

But Hannah has begun to suspect something is very, very wrong. And in a world where emotion is treated like a disease, and unknown terrors lurk inside everyone, just keeping your soul alive past childhood might be the greatest challenge of all.

"Puppet Skin is a dark, grotesquely-beautiful Bizarro nightmare fable for alienated teens of all ages. If you've ever felt lost in this deranged universe, Danger's book knows exactly what you mean." - John Skipp, author of THE LIGHT AT THE END and THE ART OF HORRIBLE PEOPLE

ARCs are available RIGHT NOW so if you are a blogger or reviewer (or know a reviewer) hit me up at danger_slater@yahoo.com and we'll see what we can do about getting you a copy.

The book releases this July, from Fungasm Press.

And if that wasn't enough...THERE'S MORE!

I have a small cameo in Anti-Films new movie THE WOLF AND THE BABY, a weird horror-comedy-thriller-I-don't-know-what-to-call-it. The whole movie is available to watch RIGHT NOW, FOR FREE on YouTube:

YOU CAN WATCH IT RIGHT HERE BY CLICKING THIS LINK!

The Anti-Films guys are great. They even gave me a speaking role which officially puts me on IMDb! Plus they're fans of my books. HOW FREAKIN' COOL IS THAT?

So please enjoy the film. Especially since it's free.

Thanks!

Danger.

Post Convention Book Sale!

After a successful and FUN weekend selling books with MP Johnson at Days of the Dead in Los Angeles, I have a bunch of extra copies of my books available. So if anyone out there wants to buy one from me directly, send me a message at or here or at my email at: danger_slater@yahoo.com.

I'm thinking $12 for one book, $20 for two, $25 for all three. This includes the shipping cost. I'll of course sign them for you and thrown in a bunch of goodies too. Tell your friends.

Thanks!

~ Danger

STRANGER DANGER, MY NEW BOOK, IS OUT NOW!!!!

 

from Strangehouse Books

by Kevin Strange and Danger_Slater

PAPERBACK

KINDLE

New Book Announced, New Short Story Published, New Interview...Interviewed?

How goes it, Dangerlings?

Man, it's been a busy few weeks for me. Writing-wise, at least. And I haven't updated this blog thingeroo so I'm cramming it all into one information-packed post. THE POST YOU'RE READING RIGHT NOW! Let me quit jabbering and start with the news:

One
I HAVE A NEW BOOK COMING OUT SOON AND HERE IS YOUR FIRST LOOK AT THE FUCKING COVER:

Here's the info on that so far:
1. It's called Stranger Danger.
2. It contains two novellas, one by Kevin Strange and one from myself (hence the title).
3. My novella is called Roadvolution, and it's fucking awesome.
4. It's coming out through Strangehouse Books.
5. It'll be released in late-April/early-May. No exact date yet, but stay tuned for details.

Two
Since we're on the subject of Stranger Danger, this past Saturday Kevin and I did a live drunken AMA on youtube, hosted by the one and only Fabulous Raye. It was a total shitshow. I was drunk before we started and hammered by the end. But if you want more info on Stranger Danger, or are a masochist, you can view all two hours of that nonsense right here:

Three
I have a new short story out! And it's free on the interwebs for you to read. It's called THEY CALL HIM BIGFOOT AVERT YOUR EYES NO AUTOGRAPHS PLEASE. You can find that at my all-time favorite online lit-mag Jersey Devil Press. I had submitted that story for a special issue for JDP founder Eirik Gumeny who is currently awaiting a lung transplant. It's sort of a benefit issue, not only to honor Eirik himself, but to help raise the funds he needs to pay for the operation and the aftercare. So, if you're the type of person who wants to help out a good friend and great writer, consider donating HERE to his COTA fundraiser. Seriously. Give. I'm not saying hand him your first born, but every little bit helps.

[Speaking of Eirik, he's got a new book out too! The THIRD novel in his hilariously inappropriate Exponential Apocalypse series, called HIGH VOLTAGE. You'd be a dumb dummy if you don't pick up a copy of this motherfucker's book this very instant!]

OKAY - that's about it, I think. A lot of info thrown at you and I don't feel like recapping it all, so if you do want a recap, just scroll back up to the top of this page and read the post all over again. Just click on all the links I dropped, okay? That's what's important here.

Anyway, Dangerlings, thank you, as always, for reading. I love each and every one of you more than you know.

Danger!

I'm On Crack! Er --- I mean, A PODCAST!

Yeah, ignore that title. I'm not on crack. Unless you got some....

My segment with The Surreal Grotesque Podcast just went up. And it's a grand ol' time, if I do say so myself, which I suppose I just said, so that's kind of redundant. ANYWAY, this is a wonderful podcast with lots of interesting bizarro authors so CHECK IT OUT:

Listen or Download Here

Let the smooth sounds of my voice satisfy your ear pussies.

And a BIG thank you to Jeremy Maddux for having me on the show. That dude deserves a medal or something for doing what he does. I'd give him one, but I'm a fuckin' author. I don't have any money.

Enjoy kiddos.

~ Danger!

The Next Big Thing!

I rarely update my blog.

There are two reasons for this:

1.) I’m usually too busy working on various writing projects such as not working on any writing projects and playing Assassins Creed 3.

2.) I don’t consider myself a “blogger” so I have no real desire to constantly inundate you with every inane detail about the ridiculously exciting life I live as an obscure-writer-type-guy.

But today things are a bit different. Thanks to Eirik Gumeny - author of the Exponential Apocalypse books (Read them now if you haven’t already. They’re destined to be future cult classics!), founder of my alma mater Jersey Devil Press, and all around hilarious writer/mofo – I have been tagged in The Next Big Thing Blog Chain, which, as you can surmise from the name of it, is a blog chain where I’m going to talk about my next big thing. In this particular case, that would be my next book which I’m finishing up as we speak and should be out in a few months from Rooster Republic Press.

So here’s how it this blog chain works:

Essentially you find some questions below which I’m going to answer. Then at the end I’m going to tag some other writers I like and they’re gonna answer the same questions. Then they’re gonna tag some writers they like to answer the questions. And so on and so on and so on until everyone in the world has said everything there is to be said and there are no more words left unspoken for the remainder of mankinds time in this universe.

Sounds like fun, right? WELL THEN, LET’S GET STARTED!

What is your working title of your book (or story)?

My next book is actually going to be a series of three stand alone novellas that will be all bundled together under a single cover in one nice, little package. Like firewood. Or cigarettes. The actual book doesn’t have a title yet but the three novellas in it are titled as follows:

KNIGHTS OF THE WHITE CASTLE

SOMNAMBULANT

ME & ME & ME & ME & ME & ME & ME & ME

Where did the idea come from for the book?

Well, since there are three books in it I guess I’ll run through them all here:

The idea for KNIGHTS OF THE WHITE CASTLE I had several years ago. I was driving past a White Castle and I began wondering why it was called that. I guess this was before everyone had smartphones because otherwise I would’ve just looked it up immediately.


Actually, I think I’m going to look it up right now. Hold please...

...Oh cool. Here's the link to that if you’re interested in the history of White Castle, but let me assure you, it is substantially less entertaining than the rest of my answers to these dumb questions.

Anyway, where was I? Oh right, so I drove by and was wondering why it was called White Castle. Then I drove past a Burger King and Dairy Queen and I just thought it was weird that all these fast food franchises were nominally related to medieval feudalism somehow. So I just took it one step further. One very weird step further.

SOMNAMBULANT was another idea I had years back and I’ll be honest, I have no clue where it came from. It was so long ago. If I had to guess I’d say I was bored at work and thinking about where to find a hiding space where could take a quick nap without getting fired. The story is about a sleepwalker if you haven’t put it together yet. That’s what somnambulant means. Get a dictionary.

ME & ME & ME & ME & ME & ME & ME & ME is the one that I’m currently working on. I like to listen to music when I write. I put my headphones on and turn it up real loud. I guess some people might find that distracting but I find it helps me fall into the rhythm of writing. Plus it fills in all those awkward moments where I’m staring at my computer screen like mongoloid while I think of what to write next. Me & Me & Me & Me & Me & Me & Me & Me is a more somber tale than the others and the idea came to me while listening to “No Surprises” from Radiohead.

What genre does your book fall under?

Satire. Humor. Bizarro. Sci-fi. Pre-apocalyptic. Schlock. Pervy shit. Fergilcious.

Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition?

You know what? Originally I had picked just one of the novellas and spent an hour sitting on my couch thinking about which actors would play which characters, but in the end, I didn’t like any of my answers. So every character in every novella I would like to be played by Martin Lawrence in varying degrees of crossdressing/fatsuits.

What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book?

Three tales of dumb shit you’ll probably hate.

Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?

An agency? Like the CIA?

Nah. It’s coming out through small-press.

Rooster Republic Press, to be exact. 

How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?

Each novella is around 15,000 words and the first draft usually takes a around a month. Or two. But that’s the easy part. Trying to make some sort of cohesive story out of 35 pages of rambling pop culture philosophy and bizarro dick jokes? Things get tricky.

What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?

To be a writer you basically are just ripping off other writers smarter than you, then crapping it out and calling the smell your own. In that way this book will be like every book I’ve ever read.

Who or what inspired you to write this book?

Um...well, boredom is always a factor. I had just got fired from my shitty day job and was spending my days watching Keeping Up With the Kardashians on E! That Scott Disick – what a character, amiright? Anyway, about that time I got an email from Etienne DeForest who helps run Rooster Republic Press. My short story “Apple of my iPhone” had just appeared in their last anthology TALL TALES WITH SHORT COCKS 2 (Buy a copy this instant, you assholes!) He was all like “Whatcha workin on now?” And I was like “I had a couple of ideas for these novellas and such.” And he was like “You should turn those ideas into actual stories and perhaps we will publish them.” And I was all like “Well that’d be awesome. I’ll start working on it immediately.”

And by immediately I of course meant after The Kardashians were over.

What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?

I’m tired so if I haven’t done it yet, then I give up.

* * * * * * * *

So there you have it. Now you know all about my new book. OH – the book itself doesn’t have a title yet, so if anyone has any ideas, I would love to hear them. It could be related to the stories themselves or a non sequitur would also work. Remember, there are no dumb suggestions, just dumb people.

So before I sign off let me direct you to the three writers I tagged to participate in the Next Big Thing Blog Chain. Without further a-doo-doo, here they are:

Arthur Graham – writer of the funny, trippy, experimental novel Editorial and the editor of my new as-yet nameless book. He’s very active on Goodreads, so you should probably send him a friend request there and then he can leave hilarious and asinine comments on your book reviews just like he does on mine!

David Wallace Fleming – silky-voiced writer of several volumes of funny short fiction like this one, and this one. He’s also got a sweet audiobook for Not From Concentrate that you can buy. I used to listen to it on my way to work when I had a job I had to drive to. It made my commute much less shitty.

Douglas Hackle – is a writer guy who I don’t believe has a novel out yet, but he fucking should. He has written some of the best short stories I’ve ever read online. Like this one. Did you read it? Holy fuckballs – three sentences in and I was sold. I’ve already pledged my undying allegiance to the Church of Hackle. You should too.

There you have it folks. Have fun. The end.

Danger

Free Love (Me)!

Good Evening, You Beautiful Monsters!

I have great news for all you cheap-asses out there:

Jersey Devil Press just announced that the digital copy of LOVE ME for the Amazon Kindle will be free from  Monday 10/29 through Friday 11/2!

Click here and get yourself copy right now!

And, because you are all so goddamn lucky, JDP has also decided to give away two of their other excellent titles as well!

Exponential Apocalypse by Eirik Gumeny

and

Perhaps by Stephen Schwegler

THREE BOOKS ALL FOR THE PRICE OF NOTHING!

Here's the links once again:

Love Me

Exponential Apocalypse

Perhaps  

How very generous of Jersey Devil Press! Check out these great books. If you like, maybe tell your friends or drop a review on Goodreads or Amazon. At the very least, give it a try. THEY'RE FUCKING FREE! WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT!?

That is all,
~ Danger

Tall Tales with Short Cocks vol. 2!

Good people of the World Wide Web,

I know you've been on the edge of your seats for many, many months, eagerly anticipating a new story from your all-time favorite author. That day is finally here! NO, I'm not talking about this fucking lady. I'm talking about ME! I HAVE A NEW SHORT STORY OUT! And man, as far as techo-horrorotica satires go, it might just be the greatest story ever written!

It's called THE APPLE OF MY IPHONE and it can only be found within the pages of the latest anthology from Bizarro Press:

Tall Tales With Short Cocks vol. 2

So not only does TTwSCvol2 have a wicked looking acronym [reference: see 8 words ago] but it also is chock full of some of my favorite writers, including Eirik Gumeny, Douglas Hackle, Christy Leigh Stewart and David Wallace Fleming. Plus a whole bunch more!

BUY IT RIGHT NOW FOR YOUR KINDLE! Only $2.99! I believe the print version will be out soon as well, if your one of "those" people who want their books made out of tree semen.  That is what printed books are made of, right?

So what are you waiting for? That's 15 goddamn weird, borderline inappropriate and most excellently entertaining stories you're going to read, all for the cost of a slice of overpriced pizza!

TALL TALES WITH SHORT COCKS vol. 2, featuring my story THE APPLE OF MY IPHONE!

Happy purchasing,

Danger!

Facebook Friends Unite!

I started a Facebook group to help promote the blog, which in turn will help promote my writing, which in turn will help promote me, which in turn will help promote you........at your job!
That's right folks, joining my Facebook group will give you that extra-edge you need at work!
You'll be thanking me later when your smoking a big, fat cigar on your private yacht, rap-video girls all dancing up on your crotch, mountains of cocaine on the patio deck, the Caribbean sun giving you that healthy, brown tan you've always wanted but couldn't get during those drippy, New Jersey winters...
....or you could just go about your life and not join the Facebook group.
The choice is yours.

http://www.facebook.com/#!/group.php?gid=135554533140102

Sincerely,
Your Friendly Neighborhood Danger! Man

Welcome!

Welcome to the most dangerous blog on the internet!
Why is it dangerous, you ask?
Because I use a lot of exclamation points!
If you don't know me, I am a writer. This page is my home.
It all begins somewhere. And that place is here.
So sit back, friends, and enjoy the ride.

Hugs and Kisses,
Danger